Wednesday, December 16, 2009


I didn't find out until after I posted the blog about Linda being chosen aas one of the most caring students in her school that Jamie was also chosen as well. His teacher called to tell me the news and thanked me for raising such caring children. It is nice to have someone tell you that you are doing something right instead of butting in with their input on what they think you are doing wrong. I get so frustrated when that happens. Now my friends that spend a lot of time with the kids and I can talk about stuff like that, but if you are someone who hardly ever sees the kids, or never has them by themselves, then you don't know enough to judge. I try really hard to remember that myself. For example, if I see a parent jump all over their child for something that seems kind of small I try to think about all the times people might have thought that about me. Usually what they didn't see was the 10 times I had asked my kids to do something or stop doing something before you got there and by the time you go there I was completly frustrated and my kids had exhausted their warnings. I remember one time about a year ago Linda had lied to me. I knew she was lying (her teacher had called me), she knew I knew she was lying but kept proceeding to lie. I finally told her she had to stay in her room until she felt like telling the truth. Now company came over that night and of course Linda sits in her room and milks if for all it is worth, crying (no real tears though) and whining, and just acting pitifully. The company proceeds to jump all over me about how seven year olds don't know that they are lying and blah, blah, blah until I get mad and snap at my company. What the company didn't know was that it was the third time that week Linda had lied about the same thing, or that within five minutes after they left when Linda realized the crying wasn't getting her anywhere, she told the truth and got to come out. So again I think it comes down to the old adage, do not judge unless you have walked a mile or twenty in the parent's shoes. If the chold is not being physically abused, starved, beaten, neglected, or similiar things, then don't judge. Also don't harp on someone if you are not willing to be part of the solution. For example, don't harp on me about my kiddos having to go to daycare with strangers while I worked if you stayed at home and could have watched them but didn't want to have interference in your own life. This is a example of if you are not willing to be part of the solution, then don't put your two cents in about the problem. I also can personally gaurantee you that nobody is harder on us than Jake and I are on ourselves. You have no idea how many nights we lie awake trying to figure out what we should be doing differently. I will get off of my soapbox now, I just had a family member who told me something someone had said to them in judgement and it made me angry and since my blog tends to reflect my mood at the time of posting there you have it. I look forward to all of the e-mails and facebook comments I recieve. i am quite sure there are people put there who share my feelings on this subject.